We went to visit Max’s park a few days before the July 4th holiday. I had these pinwheels I had been meaning to drop by for weeks (the drought has made the ground impossibly hard and I had to HAMMER them in.) It’s been on my list and I just wasn’t getting to it- the heat makes it hard, swim lessons made it hard, being out of town made it hard. It had been almost two months since we had visited Max, which seems SO long to me. For some reason I imagined that in my absence, his little place would be over grown with weeds, his stone extra dirty, things generally out of order.
So we stopped to get donuts and milk like we often do and drove into the loop around the cemetery. As we pulled up I noticed that nothing was out of place, everything looked exactly how we left it. Sure, there was some dirt from the ground blown up to the stone like there always is. I got my cleaning kit out and the kids ran around with their donuts.
Max’s place was okay. It was okay for us to be gone. Max is OKAY. It’s okay to have life and be busy and be happy in between. I’m okay. I mean, I feel like a different person than I was before he was born, but that’s alright. It just sort of hit me that Max WANTS us to be okay!
We had a really nice, low key weekend with our family. We went to the lake, had a date, ate some great food, did some more swimming, ate more good food, and sort of watched fireworks.