Hey you in there! I don’t know if I should call you a girl fetus or a boy fetus yet, so I will just say hey you. I don’t want to give you any weird life long complexes about your identity you know.
You have now been incubating in my uterus for 12 wonderful weeks. We are almost 1/3 of the way through this thing! It seems like just yesterday you were the size of a sesame seed, and now you are the size of a lime. Tomorrow you will probably learn to walk and ask to borrow the station wagon. The answer is no.
Fetus- you are over two inches long and you weigh 1/2 ounce now! This week you are learning reflexes. You don’t know what that is? Well, its kind of like when your dad takes the last bite off of my plate, my reflex is to smack him in the face. Yours are a little bit different- you can open and close your hands, your toes can curl, and you are swimming laps in some sweet amnio fluid. Your intestines are outside your body, protruding into the umbilical cord but that will all fix itself soon, don’t worry. That would really be a problem come Kindergarten.
How am I doing? Why, thank you for asking. Besides growing in every direction, I am feeling pretty good. I mean, I could seriously sleep 29 hours a day and still barely drag myself out of bed in the morning. Some different foods I am consuming: Orange juice by the gallon, Cool Ranch Doritos (sometimes WITH the orange juice. heaven), pineapple, wheat bagels, and airheads.
I should give you a heads up- Grandma wants to name you Dexter. This is coming from a woman who almost named me Mitchell (phew), and will probably present you with a complimentary glue gun before your umbilical cord is cut. You will meet her soon enough- she is cooler than me and will spoil you rotten. Don’t worry, we will have the name thing handled by the time you get here. Grandma will understand.
You should also know that your dad is ridiculously in love with you. He talks about you all the time, wonders what you will look like and what kind of little personality you will have. I know he will take such good care of you because he already takes great care of me.
Ok well keep on growin’ in there and do your thing. We’ll talk more next week when your ears have moved into the right place.