Don’t freak out–Its not technically a “Christmas” background, okay? Take a deep breath. There is not a trace of red or green to be found. Its just a nice, winter-y blue layout. We can get through this awkward transition period….together.
Today’s subject is something that is near and dear to my heart. Nay, it is sacred. It is spoken about with a soft hushed reverence. There are few things in my life I put above this very special place. I think you know what I am talking about.
Target. Or as my mother always calls it– Tarjay. My mother likes to make things fancy. I thought this was a totally separate store until I turned 18 and moved away to college.
Last Saturday night, Husband took me on a date. We finally got a sitter for the kids and had a night on the town. (ha! see that’s funny because we don’t have any kids! and someday, I will actually type that sentence, and mean it. not so funny.) Husband wore his nice collared shirt. I wore something cute and purple. And we dined out at America’s finest: The Red Lobster. Don’t hate, its delicious. After consuming Florida’s entire population of shrimp, we waddled to the car.
“Where to?” Husband asked.
With a slight smile I replied, “Target?”
“Okay, lets go.”
If you are very lucky, you will score a husband like mine, who will let you shop at Target whilst (its a word.) on a date. And, as a bonus he will pretend to like it. And, if you are very, very lucky, he might even foot the bill.
“What do we need from Target?”
“Oh, I don’t know, probably everything.”
This is true. Usually I need one of everything from the $1 bin section.Plastic cups, dog outfits, one-sies, stickers, notepads, you name it. Bargain! I also feel like everything I see at Tarjay belongs in my house. That frame would be perfect in the hallway! That rug was totally made for our spare bedroom! That lamp! Its divine! Those weird tall flower things would be great outside on the porch! Husband is quick to point out we don’t really have a porch. We live in a basement. Good point, honey. Does that mean we don’t need this deluxe patio furniture? But its on sale!
After the $1 section, I hit the greeting cards. After that I peruse the movies on sale, browse the baking aisles, stock up on toiletries, and finish off with a jaunt through their clothing section. Me + Merona = Bff.
It is 100% impossible to exit Target without spending under a $100. This is called the Legend of Target. Except its not a legend. Its real. Even if you are in line, ready to check out, there will be some Trail Mix and Gum and a Lighter and some Tide On-The-Go that WILL put you over the $100 mark. Try it, I dare you.
We left Target with the following items:
- OXO whisk
- 2 eco friendly non-leaching reusable water bottles
- diet orange soda
- a pleather jacket, on sale.
- black sweater
- Advent Calendar (no, its not up yet. back off.)
- a greeting card for someone who reads this blog therefore I can not disclose the recipient
- baby powder, travel size
- holiday sprinkles set
Total target bill: $105.60
Damn that legend. More like a curse.