this is it.

Yesterday, I found myself the chauffeur of kind of a hodgepodge group- one very smart two year old, a sleepy 4 month old, and my awesome mother. As we drove across town in the crazy pouring rain, Madilyn led us in round after round of Itsy Bitsy Spider, complete with hand actions, facial expressions, and clapping. We laughed as we argued over the validity of Itsy Bitsy versus the less popular version Eensy Weensy and I believe the Itsy Bitsys won.

As I was driving, a still small voice whispered to me
This is it! This is where you are supposed to be.
This is what you are supposed to be doing.

This morning I was scrubbing toilets and folding laundry and accomplishing all things domestic. Except vacuuming, I hate vacuuming. I was putting away the same clothes in the same drawers in the same I did on Monday, thinking my life was a tad on the monotonous side. When I was finished polishing the sinks and windexing my mirrors, my house was shining.

Putting away my cleaning supplies-
A still small voice whispered to me.
It’s okay! This is where you are supposed to be.
This is what you are supposed to be doing.

Later I was trying on some pants that were obviously not fitting past my thighs. Its discouraging really, to know I’m not one of those women who just bounce back from pregnancy. Have you ever seen a squash ball? Thats more my style of bounce. Just kind of dead and floppy on the ground. I looked in my closet and realized that 90% of the clothes hanging don’t currently fit me. I cried a little bit.

A still small voice said to me.
Don’t worry! It will come off eventually.
This is where you are supposed to be.
This is what you are supposed to be doing.

Isabelle has a bit of a bug lately and as a result is awake at 4 am consistently. You can probably guess that I am thrilled about this. Me – Sleep = Zombie slash Ursula. Now I feel so spoiled thinking about when she slept so well through the night- I should have appreciated it more. Anyway, as I was rocking her swaddled burrito body back to sleep, she looked so peaceful, her miniature lips parted a little as she breathed in deep sleep.

A still small voice whispered to me
This is it. This is where you are supposed to be.
This is what you are supposed to be doing.

Confirmation is so comforting.